Thinking about expanding your dating pool? You’re not alone. The fastest way to increase your choices is to meet people from different backgrounds.
Dating is already awkward enough when you’re dating someone of the same race or culture, so you can expect an increase of cringe-inducing moments when connecting with other ethnicities.
Try to take it all in stride, being uncomfortable is just a part of dating, and it always will be. Focus on whether their values align with yours and if you feel positive and compatible when you’re together.
Here are 3 Tips for a Successful Interracial Dating
- Be Open-Minded
This one should be easy because, to some degree, you already believe love is love and can cross ethnic and racial barriers – otherwise you wouldn’t be reading this. Nonetheless, it’s important to have an open heart and mind to the possibility for love.
Be aware of the fact that there may be cultural differences when it comes to things like flirting. For instance, some cultures may seem as if they have a more ‘aggressive’ style of flirting than others.
Respect their background, but be open and curious. Do a little research on your own before your meet up, but keep in mind neither of you should look at the other as an ambassador or racial professor of your group.
2. Question Your Pre-Judgements
As human beings, regardless of whether you’re used to being discriminated against or accused of doing the discrimination, we all make judgements against one another.
Be aware of them and honestly hold yourself accountable for the prejudices you hold against another ethnicity that you may be bringing with you on a date. If you wouldn’t like it said to you, don’t say it to anyone else – please avoid believing you have a right to disrespect another person’s culture or use slurs, even playfully.
Quick note here: your one friend that doesn’t mind racial teasing has nothing to do with everyone else. Don’t assume your friend is the president of their race – your date may not like it. This goes for previous partners too. Dating one Chinese person doesn’t mean your next Chinese partner will be the same: tons of diversity is in every culture.
3. Date the Person, Not Their Race
There’s no need to dwell on someone’s race before your even get to know them. That’s worth repeating: race is not a part getting to know someone. Not one person on the planet can simply be defined by the skin color they were born with.
If you truly want to get to know someone, ask them about their dreams and aspirations, pet peeves, guilty pleasures or what they do on a Saturday morning. Don’t forget to share your story, and let them get to know you, too.
After all, that is the point of interracial dating right?
When you get over the difference in physical appearance of a person (and hopefully that happens pretty fast), what you’ll be left with is a person who is interested in getting to know you, or at least hanging out for a little bit!